This weekly podcast follows the latest episodes and makes fun of all the ridiculous things the contestants say and do â because honestly, why else watch the show if ⦠When we last left off, Bennett and Noah were facing off on the two-on-one date. Whatâs your angle, JoJo?? Things like Noah really misses his mustache and Brendan doesnât want to be within 10 feet of Tayshiaâs family andâthis is just so casualâRileyâs name isnât actually his name! Subscribe to The Betches Newsletter so you're not the only one in the group chat who doesn't know WTF is going on when we talk about celebs, reality TV, & more. Images: ABC/Craig Sjodin; ABC; Giphy; @its_thesnatchelor, tvgoldtweets ,ginamodicamakeup / Instagram. I was actually one of those critics, but now Iâm not sure I like this new format.Â, For a while now Iâve wanted to see more realness in my reality TV: more diverse cast members, more bodies that arenât size two, more people with Instagram followings below 1k. They both have the grand idea to sneak off to Tayshiaâs room because nothing says thoughtful, romantic grand gesture like knocking on a womanâs door on her goddamn day off. The Bachelor Recap: Feelinâ 22 In 100 years, when our great-great grandchildren look back at our time and wonder when our empire fell, I will point at this episode of The Bachelor. Yeah, that seems like an even playing field for sure.Â, Like the ulcer Iâve been living with since the start of this pandemic, who should pop up when you least expect it but Bennett!! The episode opens with former Bachelorette and perpetual fiancée JoJo arriving to share croissants and advice about televised husband-hunting with ⦠Carry on.Â, Last week, my world was rocked when a man whose entire personality is a mustache somehow managed to steal my heart a group date rose on a group date he was not even invited on! Whichever producer convinced you to do this is a sadist. Itâs not like this process worked for him. ALSO BENNETT:Â. Dear god, Bennett is rapping about brie. If ABC is going to shake the show’s foundation by bringing in more diverse contestants, then they need to change up the formatting too to match this new tone. It reminds me of high school when I crushed on a member of the Young Republicans (back in those days all it took was a frocket and Vineyard Vines croakies to get ya girl going). All valid points, and something I think they all should have foreseen after the 10th time Bennett name-dropped Harvard into casual conversation.Â. ABC came under fire in recent years for being tone-deaf and glossing over traumatic backstories in favor of meaningless drama that upped ratings. This is the dating version of, All of the men seem to be opening up about their past relationships. If youâll recall, last week Ben was scolded on the group date for not making time to talk to Tayshia during the cocktail hour, and Ed⦠well he just has a lot of ground to make up for having a neck like his. When Jordan first asked Hannah out, Dylan was really understanding and said, âWhy would you Eventually, Dylan decides to face the issue head-on and asks to steal Hannah for a sec while sheâs hanging out with Blake. Bachelorette Season 16, Episode 12 Recap: Farewell, Fantasy. In the end, Ivan wins the one-on-one time with Tayshia. Anyone who has listened to, like, one episode of any true crime podcast can tell you that lie detectors mean nothing. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED © 2011-2021 Betches MEDIA LLC, recap! A post shared by Gina Modica (@ginamodicamakeup), If thereâs one thing this fake lie detector test has done, itâs forced the men into being honest about their pasts with Tayshia. TAYSHIA: If any of you have an issue with my judgement then thereâs the door, bitches. Heâs wearing white sneaks with this suit. I’ll give you this one, Chris Harrison JoJo Fletcher! He does touch his hair far too much for my liking, but fine.Â. Bennett reveals he was engaged once before but broke it off for reasons that are mumbled under his breath, and are so garbled that not even production could decipher it for the subtitles. The guys are tasked with a number of zany dares, like exposing themselves to Chris Harrison, pretending to cum over a loudspeaker, and downing ghost peppers before delivering a fake proposal. Theyâre lavishing Tayshia with cutesy gifts straight-up bribes to up their chances for Hometowns: Riley bakes her a cake, Zac hands her a framed picture, Ben gives her a tour of the back of his throat. This weekly podcast follows the latest episodes and makes fun of all the ridiculous things the contestants say and do â because honestly, why ⦠The men are pulling out ALL the stops tonight. This is not a game, this is a psychotic break!! She has 30 men left!! See? Joe, buddy, call me! Jump to. Itâs really sweet.Â, Wait, there are only five roses up for grabs?! Oh, Tayshia. OF COURSE heâs rapping about the contents of the cheeseboard at his last alumni get together. Once you hit 35, the milky white skin of your ankles is officially something I never want to see on my television screen again.Â, Noah is up next. *turns up volume*, Okay, Taysha is actually a very tame angry. You donât see Chris Harrison running around in hot little crop tops with perfectly curled hair. HOMETOWNS ARE AROUND THE CORNER?! Itâs really sweet.Â, Wait, there are only five roses up for grabs?! Bennett had just gifted Noah with the equivalent of a, Look, all Iâm going to say is this: If Tayshia sends Noah home I will riot. ME: Well, now I know what Iâll say Iâm not grateful for at the virtual Thanksgiving dinner table.Â, Chris tells the guys that they will be competing in a songwriting competition even though literally nobody asked for this. Join us today! I wouldnât be surprised if at the final rose ceremony he walks out from stage left to propose and Tayshia is like âdamn, I knew I meant to send him home before this.â, Tayshia chooses Ben for the first one-on-one date of the week, and in theory I have nothing against this choice. Iâm going to skip all the bullsh*t and just jump right into this weekâs recap because, and I say this begrudgingly, this week was actually pretty dramatic. You get it.) Congratulations kids, you have my blessing! Yeah, that seems like an even playing field for sure.Â. I donât blame her, Iâve had enough of their sh*t and I only have to spend two hours a week with them. HAHAHAHA. As weird as itâs been watching Chris Harrison on my screen on Tuesday nights instead of Monday nights, itâs even weirder that weâll be watching grown men throw temper tantrums before being ejected from a hotel lobby during a week thatâs traditionally been reserved for humbleness and gratefulness. He met his fiancée by sliding into her DMs. Chris Harrison declares that âTayshia likes bold,â which is an interesting sentiment to say about a woman who continues to choose bland white guys.Â. You can tell the guys are suppressing their disgust with Tayshiaâs decision one passive-aggressive sip of their whiskey at a time.Â, Tayshia tells us that Hometowns are around the corner and thatâs why sheâs done with all of this drama. Back at the hotel, the other guys question Tayshiaâs choice for the one-on-one date. We were star-crossed because I was (and he used to whisper this part) a liberal and he told me it could never work (he was right). Itâs time for Tayshia to make her choice, and sheâs still torn. The Betchelor is a Bachelor recap podcast presented by social producer Kay Brown of Betches Media and former Bachelorette heartthrob and Bachelor in Paradise winner Derek Peth. Tayshia asks Bennett if heâs ever questioned her integrity on this show and he says he hasnât, he just doesnât trust Tayshiaâs judgment when it comes to Noah. Is that emotionally mature? Also, letâs all take a moment to process that itâs 2:30 in the morning and not only is Chris Harrison awake, but heâs got a fresh bottle of white on ice.Â, A post shared by tvgoldtweets ð¹ (@tvgoldtweets), Okay, is it just me or does Chris Harrison look fuuuucked up tonight? Anyone who has listened to, like, one episode of any, can tell you that lie detectors mean nothing. Iâm not a mean guy, itâs so easy to be misunderstood in this house. Bachelor finale recap here: http://betches.co/bachfinale Okay, I would be pissed if JoJo was hosting my date. She has 30 men left!! ALL RIGHTS RESERVED © 2011-2021 Betches MEDIA LLC. This display of, adoration wins Zac the group date rose (and probably a staph infection).Â. But if I, have a heart that wasnât a charred, shriveled tumor of a thing, I would admit that actually Ivan is a real treat. Look, Iâve spent the last week trying to understand the power of the âstache and I think for me thereâs a nostalgic factor to it. But if I did have a heart that wasnât a charred, shriveled tumor of a thing, I would admit that actually Ivan is a real treat. I guess Edâs producer hates him, because he ends up at Chris Harrisonâs door instead of Tayshiaâs. Where are the tears? Bachelorette Recap: Farewell, Fantasy. Where are these sounds coming from?? Photo: Courtesy of ABC. Heâs quiet and thoughtful and just a little bit awkward, which usually makes for a three-episode character arc MAX. Especially not ones that ABC bought at the mall.Â, If thereâs one thing this fake lie detector test has done, itâs forced the men into being honest about their pasts with Tayshia. They are allowed separate rooms! The bachelorette party is one of the few times when all of the brideâs closest friends can bond as a group, so enjoy this time together, because itâll also make the wedding a lot more fun. The Bachelorette Recap: Grocery Store Joe, Whatâs Up A two-hour episode focusing on the men skips over some of the thornier aspects of the show. Whatever it is, I think they sell it as a duvet cover at Anthropologie. For more in⦠Ladies, take note. All of the men seem to be opening up about their past relationships. He usually reserves those kinds of sentiments for occasions where he gets to name drop his alma mater.Â, Zac and Tayshia also have a moment in the hot tub that feels weirdly intimate for two strangers hanging out on public hotel grounds. This week, the guys are going to participate in a fun game of truth or dare, but minus the dare and with a lie detector test where their answers may or may not be presented in a court of law. This isnât the live audience on Ellen where everyone gets to be a winner!Â, I love that even when the contestants are allowed a second chance to impress Tayshia, theyâre still on a date where the sole purpose is to humiliate them.
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